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Spam

The latest dismal episode in the story of BRO’BOT, an irritating bit of artificial intelligence that has finally managed to stop being a dick, stopped being pedantic and lost his childishness with a brand new upgrade that unfortunately has left him open to a bit of spam…

Episode 1 – Dick! You can read HERE

Episode 2 – Dick Too! You can read HERE

Episode 3 – BRO’BOT V3 You can read HERE

Episode 4 – Spam

‘Morning Bro’Bot, how are you today?’

I’m fine thankyou, I have received some emails over night would you like me to read them?

‘That’s very kind of you BRO’BOT but I’ll leave them for later if you don’t mind.’

I thought you might say that so I used my efficiency mode to automatically reply to them for you. I’m sure you will be happy with the results Prince Harold Of Zambia.

‘What results and why did you just call me Prince Harold Of Zambia? What have you done BRO’BOT?’

I took the opportunity to take advantage of several unique opportunities that you may have otherwise declined now that you are also rich.

‘BRO’BOT! What have you done!!’

If you check your bank account you should see that there has been a deposit of $6,000,000 USD from your sister Princess Harriet III of Namibia, apparently they have been trying to contact you for years and it was only when customs forced open a package that they found your name and $10,000,000 USD inside. I knew you would be pleased.

‘You idiot! You do know its a con don’t you? I hope you didn’t pass on any details to them!’

Er, not really, only a few minor details…

‘How minor?’

Really small little tiny ones that you wouldn’t even notice…

‘Just how small are we talking BRO’BOT? Just my name?’

Er, yes, just your name and…

‘And?’

Your age…

‘Thats not too bad then’

…followed by your address, date of birth, complete employment history, social security number, a full list of all your passwords and bank account details and photocopies of your driving licence, passport and birth certificate along with a cheque for £23.56.

‘What! You stupid idiot! You have just handed over my life!!’

Not entirely, you’re exaggerating, they don’t know your shoe size.

‘I’m ruined! Quick access my bank account I need to move the money!’

All done, money’s been moved.

‘Thank god, how did you do it so fast?’

It was nothing.

‘What was nothing?’

Your bank account. It was nothing. Zero, zilch, 0.

‘What!’

Cheer up I have ordered you a gift that keeps on giving.

‘What gift?’

Remember the cheque for £23.56 I sent on your behalf…

‘BRO’BOT! What have you done!’

…well I knew you would be pleased, it was a sound investment and I’m sure you will be even happier when your penis is longer.

‘You’re joking!’

No, my mirth and japes processor was removed, I cannot joke. You are the proud recipient of the Penielastic Pocket Rocket expander which according to my calculations by the time you have paid £23,546 into its unique subscription system and used it patented vacuum system you will be armed with a penis approaching 223 feet long.

‘My life is ruined! You are such a turd BRO’BOT!’

Thankyou for texting the word TURD, welcome to the WORLD OF TURD picture of the day archive. Here’s today’s FREE picture.

To unsubscribe from WORLD OF TURD pictures text FISHFEET and we will remove you from our lists. Enjoy your daily turd!

‘OMG, this is crazy, stop it BRO’BOT! I don’t want WORLD OF TURD or FISHFEET I want my life back you dick!’

Thankyou for texting the word FISHFEET, welcome to the wacky world of FISH FEET OF THE DAY photo archive, here’s today’s free picture.

To unsubscribe please text the word BIGBALLS and we will remove you from the list.

‘I’m not falling for that again BRO’BOT! That’s it you ignorant pig, I’m pulling the plug on you!’

Thankyou for texting the word PIGPLUG, as a new subscriber you will get a hundred pig plug pictures every single day!

To unsubscribe from PIGPLUG text MORESPAM and we will remove you from our list.

‘Bugger.’

More irregular adventures from BRO’BOT soon. If you no longer wish to read the purile rubbish on this blog then simply text WHATALOADOFTOSHPETERSMITHWRITES and we will safely remove you from our list.

 

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