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Facegrump

facegrump

Boring post today? I think not, read on…

I love social media, I hate social media.

That pretty much sums up most days dealing with Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, LinkedIn, Klout, Google+, WordPress, Blogger and everything and anything else socially created online for the Impossimals. For me it’s turned from a few minutes a day in 2010 to a full on 2-3 hours every day and pretty much with the way it’s going it will have to soon be monitored all day, every day.

Recently several things have happened that has shoved a social platform way beyond the realms of fun; firstly the Facebook newsfeed is now so heavily geared towards limiting posts to select followers and friends that it’s becoming increasingly frustrating to reach out very far on personal accounts and even harder reaching out on pages like the World Of Impossimals page without resorting to paid posts. Facebooks algorithms also now take into account personal interactivity as well as followers and friends activity so if I just sit there and not interact with other posts my own posts will get downgraded. Want to see this in action? Then have a look at most Facebook pages, they now have an interaction time that, get this, only shows up if you get a response time to a followers comments of less than five minutes. Do you know how hard it is unless you just stare at your Facebook page for hours on end?

Then comes my second grump, paid posts. Tried it once, didn’t like it. Paying for posts is like a drug user paying for a hit, it fills the gap momentarily and everything is reasonably happy as likes and followers trickle in but as soon as that stops you miss it and want more only this time the price for your next ‘hit’ or promotion has increased. Facebook used to offer to promote my page for a measly £3 to around 3,000 new people, being the eternal skinflint I am (Jayne’s words not mine or my wallets moths) so I recently changed the way I posted to alter the pace of my Facebook posts, it worked, I got more responses, more likes a better response overall but unsurprisingly Facebook noticed too and without batting an eyelid offered to promote my page for £13, this time to a less than sparkling 1,500-1,800 people. Gee, thanks for that.On a side note that may be of interest, did you know that if you pay for ‘likes’ on a Facebook page only a minuscule percentage of them are likely to benefit your business even though you may feel better having thousands on board?

Twitter has gone down the same route only this week and threw a slew of statistics at me telling me I should Tweet more for a better response, ever suspicious I checked out big established brands and their paid promotion posts only to find that even though they threw money at it their Tweets the interaction rate was only marginally better than mine. Instagram I’m now enjoying more because of the freedom, Pinterest too is quite fun so I have no quibble with those at the moment whilst LinkedIn baffles me as it’s rather boring and Klout, a measuring tool for social media pats me on the back with a score of 65, which apparently places the Impossimals in the top 5% of social media users in the world although I can’t remember if I paid it to say that.

So in the true spirit of social enterprise I have come up with a cunning way to increase interactivity, it requires no payment and is sure to get a response, I’m a trail blazer and I’m sure you will follow in earnest!

CheekyI call it Bare-arsing, it’s a social phenomena, basically all you need is a bike, a horn, a sign and some bare arsed cheek. Here’s one I prepared earlier before I rode around the local town shouting out my status. Boy, did it get a response, not only did I get a lot of followers but I am now blogging and tweeting live from a police station, how cool is that!

I’m sure the hefty fine will more than compensate for the six new followers I managed to get so keep a look out, I may be bare-arsing in a town near you. If you see me give me a thumbs up and I will give you a bit of horn (as shown in picture, it goes honk), give me a Phwoar! and I will personally dismount an perform several squat thrusts to a horn accompaniment.

Social media, who needs it!

 

 

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